Holidays: How to WIN

A recent blog post from the authors of Love for Grown Ups discusses a few tips that you can use to not feel like a loser this holiday season. We’ve highlighted a few below: Find out which days you have the kids ASAP. You don’t want to cook a wonderful Christmas dinner and find out the kids aren’t coming. You also don’t want to plan a trip...

Are California Divorce Rates Rising?

As the economy recovers divorce rates naturally increase. An increase in divorce isn’t looked at positively by most people, but in this case, these are people that couldn’t afford a divorce although they’re unhappy in their marriage… and now they can. Silver lining. An important factor noted in a Los Angeles Times article is the drop in...

7 Tips to Make Divorce As Easy As Possible

Laura Wasser, a celebrity divorce attorney, recently wrote a book detailing the ways that you can divorce without it ruining your life or your bank account. Business Insider outlined those tips, and we thought we’d share them below: 1) Tell your spouse in a loving way. This is divorce step one and it could determine the trajectory of a potentially very...

How to Behave in Court

Although this may seem obvious, we’d like go over how to behave in court. When going through a divorce or separation… or any appearance in court you make… your appearance can have a huge impact on the verdict. A judge (or jury) is swayed by everything, whether they intend to be or not. Daniel Clement shared the following tips about...

More Women Requesting Prenups

People used to think that prenuptial agreements were just for celebrities or the super-wealthy. That’s no longer the case. The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers recently released results from a survey: 63 percent of divorce attorneys say they’ve seen an increase in prenups over the past year. And just as importantly, 46 percent said they saw...

Divorce Coping Basics

A guest post from Dr. Kristine Turner… What is the number one issue between divorcing couples? I believe that control is the number one issue in any relationship and it becomes particularly clear when that relationship is falling apart, i.e. a divorce. How do control issues affect the divorce process? How you act in the divorce process can ultimately...

Five Pre-Divorce Mistakes to Avoid

When considering divorce, there will be thousands of things swirling through your mind at a million mils per hour. And it’s easy to overlook something or not see something clearly. Debbie Martinez with HuffPost Divorce recently shared these five mistakes people considering divorce often make: 1) Not meeting with a financial planner before mediation. Many...

Post-Divorce Custody Litigation?

Should I Litigate against my former spouse to gain custody over my children? A guest post by Dr. Kristine Turner… In high conflict cases where parents don’t see eye to eye, where litigation is used, no matter what plan is ordered one of the parents is likely to be unhappy with it. Parents tend to blame each other for their child(ren)’s...

Holidays– How To Prepare

Believe it or not, the holidays are right around the corner. Going through a divorce or being a single, divorced or separated parent can make life a little bit trickier this season, especially if that’s not what you’re used to. Author Karen Stewart recently shared these tips we found helpful and we wanted to share them with you. Plan now. It’s...

Game Detects Cheating Spouse

Imagine a world with a game that could detect a cheater. What a world that would be. A recent LinkedIn post we stumbled upon provided this fake scenario: Imagine a game that is essentially a headset that could detect when you see something personal. It would show you pictures of ten kids, one of them being your own. Before your brain could even realize that it...

Common Divorce Questions

A guest post from Dr. Kristine Turner: I was recently asked to answer a few questions by a reporter who was doing a piece for a publication, and I realized that these are often the types of questions society has about divorce. They are typically asked by folks who like to judge, but haven’t actually experienced divorce themselves. Here are some researched...

What can I expect when deciding custody or parenting time for my child?

A guest post from Dr. Kristine Turner… Every family that divorces has to deal with where the children will reside. It’s a very difficult question, and it’s a question that causes many people a great deal of pain and consternation. Child custody or parenting time, as it is called in some states, is big business in this country. There are...

Confronting Affair Partners

Well here’s a juicy topic. Many divorces are caused because one spouse is unfaithful. This is one of the hardest pills to swallow for anyone and it can come with a lot of challenging decisions. For example, you may have the opportunity to confront the person your spouse cheated on you with. This is a bad idea. We know you want to tell them off and give...

What Can I Expect When Deciding Child Custody

A guest post from Dr. Kristine Turner… What can I expect when deciding custody or parenting time for my child? Every family that divorces has to deal with where the children will reside. It’s a very difficult question, and it’s a question that causes many people a great deal of pain and consternation. Child custody or parenting time, as it is...

How Long Does It Take To Move On

Your divorce or separation could take days, months or years. But how long will it take to move on? First, you may not entirely know once you’ve hit that point. Does moving on mean start dating, not have feelings for your ex, or simply accepting the fact that you’re single? According to the Wall Street Journal, experts say it can take about two years....

Biggest Concern for Divorcing Couples

Before making the decision to divorce, there are probably thousands of concerns and scenarios that you play out in your head. From family, to children and jobs… the list is never-ending. Avvo, a legal forum, recently released results from a study stating that couples heading into divorce are most concerned with… the cost of splitting up. However,...

Credit After Divorce

One of the biggest financial concerns for many people going through a divorce or separation is the way it will affect their credit. Your financial situation is an extremely important consideration throughout all divorce processes. The good news is that there are ways to limit the amount of damage a divorce will have on your credit score. Whatever debt you and...

Divorce Recovery Short Cut

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn… Divorce is devastating.  In the beginning, it can leave you feeling lost, alone, confused, depressed and even unlovable.  Then, you start to feel angry and vengeful on top of feeling lost, alone, confused, depressed and unlovable.  After a while you just don’t know which horrible emotion you’re going to...

Online Dating Tips

So much of dating post-divorce is online these days. Technology has made it easier to talk to and flirt with many people at one time. The older you get, the more you feel like you might be the “only” single person around, and online dating can help prove that to be false. But many of us who are recently divorced didn’t date online before we got...

Keep Control of Your Finances

We know that divorce can be extremely pricey, and we are dedicated to educating our clients in the ways they can reduce their divorce costs. Starting over a new life after a separation or divorce is hard enough, and debt is the last thing anyone needs when they try to start new. You should at all times know what your combined expenses are if you’re in a...

Facts About Anger

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn Have you ever noticed that there’s all kinds of conflicting information “out there” about anger?  You’ve probably heard that frequent anger is deadly.  Maybe you’ve heard that anger is an important part of getting through your divorce.  You might think that anger is bad and you shouldn’t express it.  You’ve...

Tips for Men

People often stress how difficult divorce can be for women, but it can be just as tough for men. In fact, research shows that men typically recognize that their marriage is in trouble later than women do. This can make accepting the divorce and moving on that much harder. It is important to us as divorce attorneys to ensure that you are also emotionally ok, and...

Keys to Trust in a Post-Divorce Relationship

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn… You’ve probably heard recommendations from other experts about how long you need to wait after divorce before you start dating.  These other experts recommend that you wait anywhere from just 1 year to 1 year for every 4 years you were married. I disagree with these one-size-fits-all recommendations.  I believe that...

Credit Ratings

Although credit ratings do not change because of a divorce, if you are not careful, what you don’t do during the divorce can negatively affect your credit. Anytime both names are on a contract you and your spouse together are responsible for those debts. It’s imperative that you take steps to separate your finances. One way to accomplish this is to refinance...

Do You Really Trust Yourself?

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn… … Divorce is one of those life events that can cause you to question EVERYTHING. At least that’s what happened for me.  Somehow my change of marital status caused me to wonder if anything about my life was what I thought it was – was any of it real?  How could I know what was real and what wasn’t?  After...

Coping with Anger

Seething anger has a way of eating us up inside. Instead of making things better, it just makes us bitter.  It’s natural to have some angry feelings over a failed marriage and possible a messy divorce, but if you hold on to that anger it can usurp your life and affect your children in a negative manner. Understanding how to deal with your anger so that it...

Focus on the Kids!

Almost everyone knows someone who has experienced their parents getting a divorce. The breakup of a family is always challenging and emotional. It’s tough on everyone and the children often feel that their whole world is coming apart. How to help your children get through this life altering transition is critical to their well being. The most important thing...

Positive Aspects of Single Parenting

Most people agree that having a mom and a dad who love and support each other and their children is the best scenario for a family. However, single parenting does not mean unsuccessful parenting; myriads of children raised by a single parent are living rich, full, and successful lives. If you find yourself alone caring for your children, remember there are some...

Joint Tenancy and Community Property during a Pending Divorce

While going through divorce proceedings, individuals often neglect the reexamining of their estate plan. Failure to do so opens up the possibility that one of the estranged spouses could inherit all of the other’s assets. If no action has been taken to change the beneficiary, upon the death of a spouse the assets of that person are handled just as if the...

Divorce Coping Basics

A guest post from Dr. Kristine Turner… What is the number one issue between divorcing couples? I believe that control is the number one issue in any relationship and it becomes particularly clear when that relationship is falling apart, i.e. a divorce. How do control issues affect the divorce process? How you act in the divorce process can ultimately...

Changing Your Mood Might Be As Easy As Changing Your Shirt

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn: One of the most curious things that happened when I was going through my divorce was that I started to wear black almost all the time.  What was so curious about it was that I had always loved color, but for some reason I didn’t understand then, I was drawn to wearing all black for quite a while.  It was really different...

Life After Divorce For Men

Fathers, and mainly men in general, are underestimated when it comes to family and divorce.  In Love Counselor’s article, “Life After Divorce For Men,” men are advocated as equally important role models as mothers in an event of a divorce.  It seems as though men tend to get the short end of the straw when it comes to the court’s decision on divorce. ...

Dividing the Business

When dividing a business as part of the financial settlement in a divorce,  care must be taken to understand the process for the decision making. Generally a family business is an asset and therefore a source of income for both parties. Patricia Barrett, a certified divorce financial analyst makes these suggestions: Determine if the business is community...

Co-Parenting Successfully

Being a parent is the most demanding, most rewarding, and most important job in the world. We get very little, if any, training for the position. Ideally there are two parents working together to help carry the load. Even when the parents live in the same house it is exhausting and difficult. Things get even more challenging when there is a divorce or...

Divorce Court – What to Wear

As unjust as it may seem, people are often judged by the way they look. If you look neat and are well dressed you will most likely invoke a positive reaction. You have probably heard the old adage, “Clothes make the man or woman.” Most people believe that even though they may deny it. When you go to Divorce Court here are some tips on how to...

Steve Harvey’s Divorce Tips

Steve Harvey is a popular daytime talk show host that is well-respected. He recently earned a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and he shares his top 5 divorce tips. These tips are in regard to parenting and divorce with children involved… which we all know can be a huge challenge. We were curious to see what Steve would have to say. What do you think of...

The Smartest Decision You Can Make During A Divorce

As parents, it is essential to develop a partnership that encourages teamwork.  However, when a partnership is shaken, i.e., in a divorce, you undergo an imbalance that requires extra support to keep you grounded.  Unfortunately, as we get older, we teach ourselves to handle everything that is thrown at us and rely less on outside help.  This mentality is...

Financial Planning Right After Your Divorce

A top priority after divorce is a stable financial plan.  The separation should urge couples to do some “financial housekeeping” to protect all personal finances.  There are crucial measurements that need to be met in order to disassociate from a previous marriage. Identification (e.g., social security card, driver’s license, passports) and personal...

Blending Families and Finances

There are many challenges you will face when being in a relationship.  It is even more challenging  to keep a balance between your past relationship with your new relationship when either relationship includes children.  When there are multiple commitments to family members, dealing with finances can be a sticky situation.  Finances are more often than not a...

Set Divorce Guidelines

Most people tend to dive head first into a divorce. Often times this is due to high emotions or the longing to get the divorce process over as soon as possible. But a common mistake is a lack of strategic planning for anyone going through a separation or a divorce. Tips of Divorce blog says that many people try to tackle just one issue at a time and tend to the...

Mother’s Day for Single Moms

This past weekend was Mother’s Day.  It is a day to celebrate all the hard work our moms put into making us grow up to be noble citizens of society.  We oftentimes overlook all the things our moms do in order to maintain a stable and healthy family.  The sacrifices our moms took, even before we are birthed, can be easily taken for granted.  Therefore, it...

Co-Parenting Post-Divorce

The challenge of co-parenting arises from honest communication between you and your former spouse.  Trust acts as the glue that keeps both parents sincere about co-parenting.  One of the main components of success in co-parenting is when you and your spouse “both deeply care about your children and want to continue raising them in the least-disruptive...

Marriage The Second Time Around

Lisa Arends, a wellness coach and contributor to Huffington Post, describes her experience with living as a divorcee and as an engaged woman, simultaneously.  Being in limbo between the past and present makes her feel that her identity is a little hazed.  While being divorced from her ex-husband helped mold her into who she is today, there is so much more to...

Dating During Divorce

Many people believe that you should wait until you’re officially no longer married before you start dating. We have discussed dating post-divorce many times on this blog and we wanted to share a new perspective: dating during divorce. We’re not saying you have to go as far as getting pregnant and practically re-engaged while still married (i.e.- Kim...

The Dialogue That Can Lead Straight To Divorce

An important factor to a successful marriage is support.  Support brings husband and wife closer together. It nurtures the feelings of appreciation and love between one another.  By showing your support, your spouse will feel that his/her needs are communicated effectively throughout your marriage.  However, if that support is not present in your marriage,...

Befriend Your Ex?

Sounds like a crazy suggestion, right? Many of us experience extreme feelings of loathing, distrust or disgust for our ex-spouse after a bitter divorce or separation. Life after divorce does not need to be that way, but they sometimes are, unfortunately. The mere thought of someone telling you to “be friends” with your ex can rattle the nerves of...

All Tangled Up?

A guest post from Dr. Karen Finn: …. Have you ever felt all tangled up on the inside and didn’t know which direction to turn? Or maybe you’ve felt that you’re stuck in quicksand and it’s taking all your effort to just make it through each day? Or worse, you’ve felt that you’re wearing a choke-chain of all your responsibilities and don’t...

Life Lessons for Divorce

It takes more than a little bit of patience to survive a difficult divorce. In fact, divorce can be one of the most challenging things you deal with throughout your life, and even the strongest people find it completely exhausting. The gossip, money issues, bitter ex, angry children… there is little anyone can do to prepare for a divorce or separation....

Surviving Divorce

An insightful contributor to The Huffington Post blog has recollected her strategies on how to survive a divorce.  Being a divorced woman herself, Jennifer Ball is able to share her experience with divorce and support those going through the process now with her own little divorce care package.  Here are 9 things Ball suggests will help you move forward with...

Emotionally Unavailable

The process of getting a legal separation or a divorce is challenging.  What is even more challenging is being emotionally unavailable for your ex-spouse.   Oftentimes, tangible items that remind us of our ex-spouses are thrown away, but how many of those memories are actually thrown away from your thoughts?  It is difficult to move on with your life if...