A divorce or separation is traumatic. There is no denying that it is one of the most difficult things you may ever go through, and your friends and family members may suffer as well. But, there are ways to limit the stress and disastrous effects of divorce. Author Leo Averbach offers the following tips we think are useful to keep yourself in check during the divorce process:
1- Take one step at a time. Don’t get wrapped up thinking about five years from now, or even five months from now. You have enough to physically and emotionally deal with each day during a divorce, so focus on that day. Make a list of things you will/won’t do to help you make it until tomorrow, and focus on those things.
2- Let the past go. Learn from the past, but don’t hold on to it. Resenting yourself or your ex won’t do either of you any good and it will make it much more challenging to learn from the mistakes made in the marriage.
3- View divorce as a process with stages. You may, at first, feel like the pain will never subside. But it will. The grief you may be experiencing is part of the process, and it can be healthy. When you are ready, feel free to put the grief aside and move on to the next stage of divorce. The stages will pass, you just need to be patient and willing to let them.
4- Know what you want and make it clear. In many cases divorce seems like one big attorney-filled fight between you and your soon-t0-be ex. You need to know exactly what you want and make that clear to all parties involved. Find an experienced Orange County attorney to help you throughout the process– someone who will truly fight for you.
5- Build a new life. Whether you think you needed it or didn’t, this divorce is an opportunity in disguise. You have the chance to start over, in many ways. And that’s a chance many people would kill for. Use your talents, your family/children, your career and your friends to boost you into a new way of living and new way to start fresh. Make the absolute best of your new life.